"STOP BITCH!"

I only got a glimpse.  I tried to catch her but she runs with the wind and it must have been a really windy day because I'm fast.  Maybe the fastest person on my street.  My street is full of old right-winged crazies so that might contribute to their weakness.
I asked one of my friendly neighbors if they had run into this bitch lately.  This 5 foot 10 inch piece of Slav said "I only know one bitch around here and I'm pretty sure I've seen her around".  I stood there and thought well shit maybe I am slower than I thought.  Than I took a step down off his porch and looked at  his hand in his pocket.  He always had at least one hand in the pocket of his pants.  My eyes shifted to his smirk.  That smug bastard is talking about me.  He thinks he's making a joke?  My kids come running across the street (without looking - of course) and start dangling from my arms begging me to come play.  This pocket hugging jerk-off has been blessed by the Republican gods.  I turn around and walk back across the street.
I'm back on OUR side of the street.  I've decided that I'll never go back over to the other side again.  I kick the ball with my kids and forget about the Slav.  I start thinking about that woman that I must stop.  I tell the kids to line up.  Mommy has to practice sprints.  The kids are excited.  They ask me what a sprint is.  I show them and they are amazed at my speed.  We start racing.  Next thing you know the guy from the other side of the street is standing in my yard.  We stop racing and he starts blabbing about some shit that went on with the underground railroads.  I never really listen to him.  Everything about this man bothers me.  Even when he brings us half opened bottles of wine.  Nice gesture - big asshole.
When he finally leaves we run inside.  I make dinner and as we are eating my son tells me that I'm never going to get faster because I just won't.  He was right.  No more sprinting.  I really want to catch up to her just to see if I can.  That's my plan.  Anytime I see her, I'm just going to run like hell and maybe one day I'll stop her.  I have to catch her - my life depends on it.